![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
jenny-jenkins.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
crinkly_earsFrom the sublime...
Crispy Ronaldo's record-breaking goal!
To the ridiculous...
This match had it all!
The Match Spam: Villarreal 1 - Madrid 1
Madrid went to visit the not particularly atmospheric (but not particularly easy either) El Madrigal stadium to meet up with Villarreal. Last year The Yellow Submarine gained a Champions League spot and played some beautiful football in the Europa league. This year they are in a week-in week-out flirtation with relegation, having lost their version of Claude Makelele (Santi Cazorla) to Malaga.
Madrid had drawn on Sunday, so the gap (once at a nominal 13 points) had dropped to 8. A win would have been nice.
Madrid played in a not-very-commonly-employed (by them) 4-3-3 - a formation that was to prove ineffective when Lass Diarra was carded inside 3 minutes (leading to his early removal) and an injury to Jose Callejon (now confirmed: he's out for 3 weeks) messed up Mourinho's planned substitutions.
Kaka was out of the line-up. In front of the usual defence were Xabi Alonso, Sami Khedira and Lass Diarra. Benzema was in front. Crispy Ronaldo on the left, Mesut on the right.
From a Mesuty point of view the game began quite typically. He did all the usual things Mesut does during a match.
He passed beautifully:
He stood over the left side of the ball next to a right-footed Xabi Alonso and held whispered conferences with him - fact: they speak in English, not Spanish -
And then he did it again -
He formed a one-man wall and was yelled at by Iker Casillas until he was in line -
He was fouled and toppled to the ground with his usual balletic grace (note how the two players put their arms around him - and who can blame them?) -
He looked his usual sweet, crinkly-eared self at certain moments -
While chief bromantic interest Sami Khedira just looked hot and gorgeous (can anyone else on earth carry off a white-head-band?) -
And he was his usual nervous self after the break when asked to form a wall with Marcelo (note the nervous compulsive twitching of his fingers!) -
And then he assisted...
The Sublime: Mesut Assists Crispy Ronaldo's Record-breaking 1:0
"Özil...took out his violin...A verse in a night of long knives..."
No one can deny the Spanish sporting press has a way with words! If Mesut has made a slicker assist in his career I certainly haven't seen it.
...And it was beyond beautiful...And so appropriate! It was Ronaldo's 100th league goal for Madrid. It took him 91 games, smashing the record held by Ferenc Puskás (105 games). A splendid goal and a splendid pass!
...The pass was so gorgeous that Crispy Ronaldo knelt down and worshiped it...
...And there was much rejoicing!
Here is the full move - captured in the gif artistry of our beloved![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
andriy_7 - the full 22 seconds!
Off in Miami's GOLTV studios, an even more than usually hoarse Ray Hudson sounded as though he had burst into tears over "Avatar-eyes - the little German, Mesut Özil. Magisterial from him! I'm tellin' ya people! And [alluding to their chemistry on the pitch] Ronaldo knew he'd be getting the ball back from little Avatar eyes!"
The assist was gorgeous, but then so was the goal - highlighting Mr Slick's control, nerve and record-breaking balls in front of the net.
Alas. It was to be the last happy moment of the match.
The Ridiculous: Madrid Implodes
Villarreal equalized against the run of play off a free kick, Mourinho joined the team's number one cheering party, Rui Faria, in the stands (he'd already been sent off shortly after half-time). Sergio Ramos fouled a player in the heat and panic of the moment - and saw a second yellow card. And then before we knew where we were...
...Mesut joined him for an early shower.
Yes. Indeed. The second straight red of his career, following hot on the heels of his last in August, when he reacted badly to being struck twice in the face by David Villa, community villain. Official reason: leaving the bench. Mesut reacted as phlegmatically as usual and walked off as he always does - swiping his nose, headband straight off!
The official reason this time: "applauding my decision [to send off Sergio Ramos] mockingly, near my person..." Not content with mocking that decision, Mesut applauded the referee again as he was walking off to mock the second decision (to send him off!)...
No one ever denied the boy has cheek!
Mesut shushed a portion of the Madrigal crowd as he walked off...
Before telling them to STFU in Spanish (Callate!)
The bench (what remained of it) looked utterly distraught; a thumb-sucking Kaka reaching out to comfort Aitor Karanka, who must be getting sick of being stuck with the fall-out when Madrid decide (in spectacular fashion) to utterly lose it.
Things were not much more cheerful on the pitch either. Those who had not yet been sent off were quite beside themselves. Mesut's bromantic interests in particular:
Mesut's expulsion was the fourth of the evening. A straight red, which is an absurd punishment taken on its own, can only be put in context when one realizes the referee was losing control of the match. Mourinho, Faria and Ramos had already been sent off. Clapping a (correct) decision was asking for trouble.
Crispy is unsure this was a wise decision.
"Just robbed. Just robbed."
Ronaldo's reaction is a loyal and generous one - and he is entitled to feel agrieved since the darling lad was the only player left on the pitch who kept his head and still looked like he still wanted to win. But Madrid had actually benefitted from refereeing errors earlier in the match.
All things considered, the best analysis of what happened in this game has been provided by Sid Lowe of The Guardian in a penetrating article. To sum up: Madrid, frankly, lost the plot. They had 9 minutes of time remaining when Villarreal equalized against the run of play and (as it transpired) 5 minutes of extra time. 14 minutes in total, less whatever time the ball-boys and general time-wasting were going to remove. Instead of going for the go-ahead goal, the team imploded. A 9-man team of relegation prospects (Zaragoza) had defeated the third placed team (Valencia) only two hours earlier in a far more controlled display away from home - which included a late goal for the visitors.
The official Twitter feed could not restrain itself!
Ramos being sent off was a typically hot-headed move, while Mesut's was actually a typically cold one. He probably knew he'd be carded, he just didn't realize what colour the card was going to be.
And in a way, it was almost fortunate. Taken on its own the expulsion was so ridiculous it put the referee in focus rather than the players, allowing fans to feel agrieved for slightly less painful reasons.
Not many chances created, a weak first half, an absolutely screaming penalty shout for Villarreal courtesy of Arbeloa's tug-down of one of Villarreal's forwards - it was all overshadowed by the man with the cards.
And in an interesting turn of events, the Liga's refereeing assocation's website crashed shortly after the game right around the time it was suggested that Marco Ruben might have received two yellow cards and should have been sent off. It has since been determined that Senna received the card and the cameraman was incorrect - but it looked bad!andriy_7 - no less, was absolutely convinced of a conspiracy until a reassuring video surfaced. In typically Andriyesqe fashion he has made us a gif to allay any fears on that score ;)
The Post Match Fall-Out
Mourinho (who is now suspended along with Mesut, Lass Diarra, and Pepe - more on that below) refused to speak to the press - which is probably best. He and his coaching staff boarded the bus immediately, leaving Marcelo-the-ball-of-sunshine to toothily inform the press that "plenty of teams would be happy to have a 6 point lead!" in the mixed zone.
Note bromantic trending topic!*
The club, in lieu of Mourinho's usual statement, has been doing the "questioning" of the refereeing. Since defending Pepe (who is suspended for two matches after casting disparaging assertions on the referee's parentage in the tunnel post-match) or Mourinho (who's done this all too often) is probably pushing it, the club has focused on Avatar-eyes and number one fan-boy Rui Faria instead.
Miguel Pardeza, in interviews with Marca and As has stated that it was ridiculous to send off "Rui Faria simply for applauding in support of Cristiano Ronaldo. [Are you kidding me?] The same goes for Özil, a kid who is always a clean player..."
The Post-Post-Match-Fall-Out, Twitter & Press Reviews
This morning it was announced that Real Madrid (read: Mourinho) will not be giving a press conference before the match against Real Sociedad. This is hardly a shock. The coach is banned, and it isn't Mourinho's style to send out Aitor Karanka to meet the press wolves when the shit has hit the fan.
The lad is certainly beautiful.
Predictably, the Real Madrid official website has gone into full damage control mode with their usual psychotically cheerful story about how all is well in Madrid-World, statistically speaking (!) at least. in addition to announcing the creation of an actual Madrid-world in the form of an island resort in the UAE in the shape of the club's crest (would I joke about this?) they have come up with the following:
He's squeezing his thumbs - like a good German boy!
It speaks to Mesut's essential good-character and likeability that in spite of being banned, he's the fresh face of the newest charm offensive - replete with (frankly) gorgeous bug-eyed photograph of the lad as the site's lead in (see above) and lovely lead-story complete with meticulous chart, graceful photograph and cheerful feature article -
The site took note of Jenny's e-mailed objection to the website's count last week.
They are now crediting him with three assists against Granada.
She takes full credit.
El Pais wrote up his assist as follows (many thanks to Lekszi_Hekszi for the translation) and noted (in reference to the difficulty of the game to that point:
Özil, who does not understand football's roadblocks, took out his violin. There's always time for music, he doesn't mind playing in a minefield. His back-heel assist to Cristiano was a masterpiece, a verse in a night of long knives.
Real Madrid Legend Roberto Carlos - self-confessed Özil fan (who stood to applaud him in the Presidential box against Levante) took to his Twitter account:
Praise indeed!
And Marca made their usual beautiful composite (note Cristiano Ronaldo's amazing run - and that Mesut didn't move at all):
Well - there we have it. From the sublime to the ridiculous, back to the sublime.
Madrid's next game is on Saturday. Good luck lads! You need it! Win the game or Jenny shall descend upon Madrid to joinsashatwen and mimsicality (who have plainly brought the team bad luck now I think of it - get out of town ladies!) and unhappy things will transpire!
Cuddles from the ball of sunshine.
*Many thanks to our darling friends at Of Headbands & Heartbreak for the trending topics :P
Love, and love, and more love to my very belovedandriy_7 who gets all the credit for whatever subliminity the spam may possess! Gif-artistry, photographic research, newspaper research - all delivered up during his spring break with his usual indefatigable zeal! I had to leave stuff out!
.
Crispy Ronaldo's record-breaking goal!
To the ridiculous...
This match had it all!
The Match Spam: Villarreal 1 - Madrid 1
Madrid went to visit the not particularly atmospheric (but not particularly easy either) El Madrigal stadium to meet up with Villarreal. Last year The Yellow Submarine gained a Champions League spot and played some beautiful football in the Europa league. This year they are in a week-in week-out flirtation with relegation, having lost their version of Claude Makelele (Santi Cazorla) to Malaga.
Madrid had drawn on Sunday, so the gap (once at a nominal 13 points) had dropped to 8. A win would have been nice.
Madrid played in a not-very-commonly-employed (by them) 4-3-3 - a formation that was to prove ineffective when Lass Diarra was carded inside 3 minutes (leading to his early removal) and an injury to Jose Callejon (now confirmed: he's out for 3 weeks) messed up Mourinho's planned substitutions.
Kaka was out of the line-up. In front of the usual defence were Xabi Alonso, Sami Khedira and Lass Diarra. Benzema was in front. Crispy Ronaldo on the left, Mesut on the right.
From a Mesuty point of view the game began quite typically. He did all the usual things Mesut does during a match.
He passed beautifully:
He stood over the left side of the ball next to a right-footed Xabi Alonso and held whispered conferences with him - fact: they speak in English, not Spanish -
And then he did it again -
He formed a one-man wall and was yelled at by Iker Casillas until he was in line -
He was fouled and toppled to the ground with his usual balletic grace (note how the two players put their arms around him - and who can blame them?) -
He looked his usual sweet, crinkly-eared self at certain moments -
While chief bromantic interest Sami Khedira just looked hot and gorgeous (can anyone else on earth carry off a white-head-band?) -
And he was his usual nervous self after the break when asked to form a wall with Marcelo (note the nervous compulsive twitching of his fingers!) -
And then he assisted...
The Sublime: Mesut Assists Crispy Ronaldo's Record-breaking 1:0
"Özil...took out his violin...A verse in a night of long knives..."
No one can deny the Spanish sporting press has a way with words! If Mesut has made a slicker assist in his career I certainly haven't seen it.
...And it was beyond beautiful...And so appropriate! It was Ronaldo's 100th league goal for Madrid. It took him 91 games, smashing the record held by Ferenc Puskás (105 games). A splendid goal and a splendid pass!
...The pass was so gorgeous that Crispy Ronaldo knelt down and worshiped it...
...And there was much rejoicing!
Note the suitably stunned, angelic expression on Kaka's face!
Here is the full move - captured in the gif artistry of our beloved
andriy_7 - the full 22 seconds!Off in Miami's GOLTV studios, an even more than usually hoarse Ray Hudson sounded as though he had burst into tears over "Avatar-eyes - the little German, Mesut Özil. Magisterial from him! I'm tellin' ya people! And [alluding to their chemistry on the pitch] Ronaldo knew he'd be getting the ball back from little Avatar eyes!"
The assist was gorgeous, but then so was the goal - highlighting Mr Slick's control, nerve and record-breaking balls in front of the net.
Alas. It was to be the last happy moment of the match.
The Ridiculous: Madrid Implodes
Villarreal equalized against the run of play off a free kick, Mourinho joined the team's number one cheering party, Rui Faria, in the stands (he'd already been sent off shortly after half-time). Sergio Ramos fouled a player in the heat and panic of the moment - and saw a second yellow card. And then before we knew where we were...
...Mesut joined him for an early shower.
Yes. Indeed. The second straight red of his career, following hot on the heels of his last in August, when he reacted badly to being struck twice in the face by David Villa, community villain. Official reason: leaving the bench. Mesut reacted as phlegmatically as usual and walked off as he always does - swiping his nose, headband straight off!
The official reason this time: "applauding my decision [to send off Sergio Ramos] mockingly, near my person..." Not content with mocking that decision, Mesut applauded the referee again as he was walking off to mock the second decision (to send him off!)...
No one ever denied the boy has cheek!
Mesut shushed a portion of the Madrigal crowd as he walked off...
Before telling them to STFU in Spanish (Callate!)
The bench (what remained of it) looked utterly distraught; a thumb-sucking Kaka reaching out to comfort Aitor Karanka, who must be getting sick of being stuck with the fall-out when Madrid decide (in spectacular fashion) to utterly lose it.
Things were not much more cheerful on the pitch either. Those who had not yet been sent off were quite beside themselves. Mesut's bromantic interests in particular:
Mesut's expulsion was the fourth of the evening. A straight red, which is an absurd punishment taken on its own, can only be put in context when one realizes the referee was losing control of the match. Mourinho, Faria and Ramos had already been sent off. Clapping a (correct) decision was asking for trouble.
Crispy is unsure this was a wise decision.
"Just robbed. Just robbed."
Ronaldo's reaction is a loyal and generous one - and he is entitled to feel agrieved since the darling lad was the only player left on the pitch who kept his head and still looked like he still wanted to win. But Madrid had actually benefitted from refereeing errors earlier in the match.
All things considered, the best analysis of what happened in this game has been provided by Sid Lowe of The Guardian in a penetrating article. To sum up: Madrid, frankly, lost the plot. They had 9 minutes of time remaining when Villarreal equalized against the run of play and (as it transpired) 5 minutes of extra time. 14 minutes in total, less whatever time the ball-boys and general time-wasting were going to remove. Instead of going for the go-ahead goal, the team imploded. A 9-man team of relegation prospects (Zaragoza) had defeated the third placed team (Valencia) only two hours earlier in a far more controlled display away from home - which included a late goal for the visitors.
The official Twitter feed could not restrain itself!
Ramos being sent off was a typically hot-headed move, while Mesut's was actually a typically cold one. He probably knew he'd be carded, he just didn't realize what colour the card was going to be.
And in a way, it was almost fortunate. Taken on its own the expulsion was so ridiculous it put the referee in focus rather than the players, allowing fans to feel agrieved for slightly less painful reasons.
Not many chances created, a weak first half, an absolutely screaming penalty shout for Villarreal courtesy of Arbeloa's tug-down of one of Villarreal's forwards - it was all overshadowed by the man with the cards.
And in an interesting turn of events, the Liga's refereeing assocation's website crashed shortly after the game right around the time it was suggested that Marco Ruben might have received two yellow cards and should have been sent off. It has since been determined that Senna received the card and the cameraman was incorrect - but it looked bad!
andriy_7 - no less, was absolutely convinced of a conspiracy until a reassuring video surfaced. In typically Andriyesqe fashion he has made us a gif to allay any fears on that score ;)The Post Match Fall-Out
Mourinho (who is now suspended along with Mesut, Lass Diarra, and Pepe - more on that below) refused to speak to the press - which is probably best. He and his coaching staff boarded the bus immediately, leaving Marcelo-the-ball-of-sunshine to toothily inform the press that "plenty of teams would be happy to have a 6 point lead!" in the mixed zone.
And even as I was making up this spam it has been determined that Mesut has been suspended for one match - this Saturday's against Real Sociedad at home. Ramos is not banned - his first yellow card was rescinded. Pepe's yellow was rescinded too - but his straight red (issued post-match) stands and he is banned for two games.
Madrid's lead in the league table (a nominal 13 points last week) is now at 6.
Madrid's lead in the league table (a nominal 13 points last week) is now at 6.
Note bromantic trending topic!*
The club, in lieu of Mourinho's usual statement, has been doing the "questioning" of the refereeing. Since defending Pepe (who is suspended for two matches after casting disparaging assertions on the referee's parentage in the tunnel post-match) or Mourinho (who's done this all too often) is probably pushing it, the club has focused on Avatar-eyes and number one fan-boy Rui Faria instead.
Miguel Pardeza, in interviews with Marca and As has stated that it was ridiculous to send off "Rui Faria simply for applauding in support of Cristiano Ronaldo. [Are you kidding me?] The same goes for Özil, a kid who is always a clean player..."
The Post-Post-Match-Fall-Out, Twitter & Press Reviews
This morning it was announced that Real Madrid (read: Mourinho) will not be giving a press conference before the match against Real Sociedad. This is hardly a shock. The coach is banned, and it isn't Mourinho's style to send out Aitor Karanka to meet the press wolves when the shit has hit the fan.
The lad is certainly beautiful.
Predictably, the Real Madrid official website has gone into full damage control mode with their usual psychotically cheerful story about how all is well in Madrid-World, statistically speaking (!) at least. in addition to announcing the creation of an actual Madrid-world in the form of an island resort in the UAE in the shape of the club's crest (would I joke about this?) they have come up with the following:
He's squeezing his thumbs - like a good German boy!
It speaks to Mesut's essential good-character and likeability that in spite of being banned, he's the fresh face of the newest charm offensive - replete with (frankly) gorgeous bug-eyed photograph of the lad as the site's lead in (see above) and lovely lead-story complete with meticulous chart, graceful photograph and cheerful feature article -
The site took note of Jenny's e-mailed objection to the website's count last week.
They are now crediting him with three assists against Granada.
She takes full credit.
El Pais wrote up his assist as follows (many thanks to Lekszi_Hekszi for the translation) and noted (in reference to the difficulty of the game to that point:
Özil, who does not understand football's roadblocks, took out his violin. There's always time for music, he doesn't mind playing in a minefield. His back-heel assist to Cristiano was a masterpiece, a verse in a night of long knives.
Real Madrid Legend Roberto Carlos - self-confessed Özil fan (who stood to applaud him in the Presidential box against Levante) took to his Twitter account:
Praise indeed!
And Marca made their usual beautiful composite (note Cristiano Ronaldo's amazing run - and that Mesut didn't move at all):
Well - there we have it. From the sublime to the ridiculous, back to the sublime.
Madrid's next game is on Saturday. Good luck lads! You need it! Win the game or Jenny shall descend upon Madrid to join
sashatwen and mimsicality (who have plainly brought the team bad luck now I think of it - get out of town ladies!) and unhappy things will transpire!Cuddles from the ball of sunshine.
*Many thanks to our darling friends at Of Headbands & Heartbreak for the trending topics :P
Love, and love, and more love to my very beloved
andriy_7 who gets all the credit for whatever subliminity the spam may possess! Gif-artistry, photographic research, newspaper research - all delivered up during his spring break with his usual indefatigable zeal! I had to leave stuff out!.
Tags:
- assist(s),
- bromance: general,
- coach: jose mourinho,
- feature article,
- gifs,
- he's our favourite lesbian,
- la liga 2011-12,
- löl,
- match files,
- mesut (usually) means happy,
- people saying nice things,
- player: cristiano ronaldo,
- player: sergio ramos,
- press conference,
- press reviews,
- ray hudson says it like it is,
- statistics,
- the omg i don't know what to say tag,
- twitter,
- welpenschutz,
- yellow-red-card-blues
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}